Reading this blog with Giona, by Giona actually

 Well, the time has come, I am not sure when I imagined it would happen, when Giona would be reading the words that I typed for him, all about him.

It is pretty remarkable, the time has passed swiftly, almost ten years! 

Now he is an avid reader, and so many other things, but he sure does seem to appreciate looking back at a younger me, incredibly in love with baby him, in all the fastidious detail.

Now, he is a big brother!! Hawken is now 8 months old, his birthday of course is just one day before Giona's. 

I am so happy that I spent those first fresh new months documenting and recording the little details and idiosynchracies of being a new mother, of Giona's first new moments. 

I am tired. Giona read a couple entries today. It has been a couple days now that we have been delving into this blog and going back in time to see little baby Giona. it is fascinating how he and Hawken are alike in some ways, and so very different in others. 

Today, we had a playdate, yesterday we had a playdate, tomorrow we will have a playdate. I am exhausted. After being in our own little covid bubble this winter with a very simple life, it seems like such effort to spend so much social time. But we are blessed with good friends, good food, and a good home and family. I wouldn't change it for anything else. 

Tata for now!! 

Angela 

rise of the skiwalkerr

I am fucking pregnant!
Woo!
Well it has been a few months, and I have not been on here in over a year, but I decided writing an entry tonight was a good idea.

I'm about 14 weeks pregnant now, and I have a little under six months before the due date, June 21.

I am so happy to be carrying this little soul. I mean I know his soul isn't small but the body right now is. And growing it is! So much every day, it's incredible.

It feels very much like my body has been taken over. This little tiny thing has come in and took the captains chair. HIs needs are first and foremost and I must get used to it. Adapt. It's good practice being pregnant. Loving something that you haven't even met so much that you would do anything for him. And if that means eating bacon for breakfast and potatoes as much as possible and putting aside fresh veggies and most fruits, and just taking in all the salt and fat I want. It's all for you baby. You are getting the good packages of energy in the purest form. And I am the animal eating and growing to produce it for you. Building your body up sturdy and strong.

i"ve been home with Giona all day and yesterday and before that was Christmas so mostly that day too. Actually all week, we have sunk into our home space. It feels nice.

Unfortunately the circumstances demanded it. Giona had a fever and a day of vomiting and not holding down hardly anything, and today thankfully has been much better. Still weak and sore but gaining his strength.

I love him immensely. Being a mother breaks my heart with love so much. I wonder what my brain and body are doing when I feel it happening. It would be some beautiful pictures I'm sure.

The more I learn about how the brain and body control each other, and how the more we teach our body how to think, the more it goes into auto pilot and relives the past over and over. Unless we wake up to this fact and continue training the brain as well as the body to nourish and encourage growth, expansion and higher dimensions. It is all there stored in our bodies, stored in our cells. And every thought matters. Every thought determines what we repeat and what we do different. It's fascinating.

As well is enlightening to hear how the body has energy stores that can be sent to the brain to experience higher vibrations. I have always felt that my body had so much intelligence and that is what i think I feel, that we get energy and information from our bodies into the brain.

I'm also so happy to discover some new prenatal yoga videos and meditations. It is something I have been missing the past week, (well exercise in general, but especially yoga), and I have also been feeling like it is time to transition my normal exercise routine into some more informed for prenatal and birthing. My lower back and sacrum have felt loose and clicky, and my left hip has been super tight and creaky. My knees as well are super creaky. I think it might be due to less regular movement, with it being winter as well, and now with no Chiron monster.

Anyway, the yoga channel I found, I believe is called Kukoon Yoga, is taught in beuaitufl outdoor settings, really artistic and peaceful and the teacher is just so beautiful in how she both speaks and practices. She encourages a lot of awareness on the baby as well as giving permission for mothers to really let loose and feel into themselves and their needs.

This is something that is easy to overlook on days caring for a sick child, working, being indoors more than not, and just being in the daily life routine. My mind has become quite busy and chattery. It is nice to connect with a home practice where you can drop in and get healing right at home.

I want to fix up the upstairs bedroom nice and cozy like a little midwives office or birthing center./ office/ and yoga/meditation space.  I want to equip it with a whole home apothecary. I want to increase my supplies of home remedies. I need elderberry, to make some syrup, and tea. More ginger, more raspberry leaf. I need mint oil, and massage cream and oil. More jojoba oil. I want some good rubs for my growing belly and body. I need a new diffuser. And Charcoal bundles for all over the house!More lavender oil, because you can never have too much. Some rose oil would be nice.
Oh and lighting. This room needs better lighting. Somehting warm and ambient. I think we just need many more salt lamps around the house. Here downstairs and maybe even the basement.

Giona just did the biggest sigh.
Awwww. Like a good 5seconds. Just gave him a little water.

Well I feel I'm getting emotionally sturdier. The last month was extremely challenging for me, but I am so blessed to be supported by my jobs and bosses, my friends, by Giona, most of all, and by our family from afar. We have resources. And somehow just going to work and moving and doing what I need to do to show up with integrity gets me through tough days or weeks.

As much as I love working from home, it is also wintery and has been very cold, until recently, so it can feel a bit sedentary. But I wish to find a good flow, take more brisk walks and rides with Giona, and practice more movement at home and be nourished and replenished here instead of needing to find that replenishment outside of our home or selves. Taking baths, writing, connecting with Giona, making art- wha??, and centering.

It's funny how being in relationship for me always takes my attention out of the home. It is nice to find myself getting more nested and nestled in our home after a lot of transitions and even this month air bnbing this healing office studio where I now am sitting.

I think it's time for me to love up my home and give it the energy and love and attention it needs, along with myself, Giona, and the baby. The home is an extension of self-love.
I want to replant/resoil the house plants.

Morning Pages: Innovative ways to teach literacy

I always enjoy incorporating cultural studies into the classroom and since language is all around us, within cultural studies, there is an easy subject matter for words and language. When teaching elementary Spanish, I would bring music, and we would listen to the song a few times, after I had introduced the singer/songwriter, and perhaps it correlated with some other theme in the class like a holiday, a Spanish-speaking country, or covering a topic like the seasons or nature. Then I would use a fill in the blank style class activity, and we would listen to the song multiple times to give students the opportunity to fill in the blanks. Depending on the age of the students and the vocabulary, the words can be given to them at the bottom of the sheet, or perhaps after one try, the list of words can be available. This was always a fun activity and incorporated the learning style of auditory learning.

Another cultural studies activity that I have used is bringing in a magazine or newspaper in Spanish. I then had the class take turns reading an article.

Morning Pages: Throwing Hands Up, Throwing in the Towel with Honesty

This morning's topic for our morning pages is Failure and how we as teachers can package failure in our classroom. I think a lot of what we deal with in our life is dependent upon the package or frame that we mentally put it in. Through this packaging, we choose how we want to deal with the issue, and more than anything it is a conversation with ourselves first and foremost. Following that packaging and conversation, we have the choice to share it with the world depending on how introverted or extroverted we are. A lot of people use social media for just this. But as a teacher, when failure happens in the classroom or in our life, we have the choice and what I believe the responsibility to be vulnerable and transparent with our students by sharing with them how we deal, package and frame the moment of failure so that we can give them and ourselves an opportunity to grow together. Being a mother, I have found this tool extremely humbling, attuning and eye-opening, as well as relieving and as a creative doorway to solutions and new turns.
So, you may be thinking, well, what does that packaging look like? I like to remember as Leonardo Da Vinci has said,
 I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. 'Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principles unto death.

I believe "teacher as lead leaner" is totally valid. We don't want to be on a pedestal where we don't make mistakes, are the experts, and create a gap between our students are ourselves. 

Foster children need more stability in their education and ESSA can help

"Still, foster care children face too much educational instability." This quote is taken from the 2014 article in the Atlantic, 

Every Time Foster Kids Move, They Lose Months of Academic Progress.  

However, according to the recently signed bill ESSA, Every Student Succeeds Act of 2015, there is language that includes intentions to aid in the stability of education for foster children as described in EWA's website article, Ensuring Educational Stability for Foster Kids.  ESSA intends to ensure that foster kids are able to enroll speedily when switching schools, which is on average happening once or twice a year for a foster kid. This instability leads to loss of advancing and progress in their school year. I can only imagine what moving to a new school, let alone a new family each year would feel like. It would put so much confusion and pressure that focusing on school would be difficult. ESSA includes provisions that will allow foster kids to remain in the same school even if their home is in a different district, as well as transportation, a designated counselor or "point person". It also calls for states to follow the academic progress of these groups of students to ensure their proper support. 

I feel like ESSA is a huge improvement from NCLB. It is going to take time and a whole lot of administration to implement, but I think it is definitely a huge step in the right direction. 
I feel that as a preservice teacher it will help teachers as myself better guide foster kids and other underprivileged populations in getting a more equitable education, and improving their chances of graduation and progress. 

Public Waldorf Education and Teach Unicef on educational reform strategies

"Our highest endeavor must be to develop free human beings who are able, of themselves, to impart purpose and direction to their lives."

Rudolf Steiner (1861-1925) 

After reading about two websites with educational reform strategies, one being the Alliance for Public Waldorf Education and another being Teach Unicef.

The Alliance for Public Waldorf Education or APWE's main reform agenda includes reforming educational curriculum to focus on Rudolf Steiner's educational methodology. One of the beliefs is that students should not be taught technological literacy in schools until sixth grade because of the need for young kids' brains to gradually develop in cognitive and socio-emotional ways that face to face relationships provide. They believe in relationship building through hands-on learning, creative play, visual and dramatic arts, music, exploration in nature, and movement. It provides teachers with materials for whole child assessment. They also are working towards implementing Waldorf programs and opening public Waldorf schools.

The Teach Unicef program is an initiative to inform educators on global learning and citizenship. It offers in class student workshops to teach them of the need for humanitarian action in the world and issues of human and child rights, while teachers receive student magazines, lesson plans, and webinars.

I support the agendas of both of these organizations because I believe in the necessity for children to form positive personal relationships in schools and classrooms off the screen, and to spend substantial time in movement, physical activity, arts learning, and time in nature. I think that children will adapt to technology just as quickly at 11 years old, as they would at 5 years old. I think there is no reason to rush this immersion. I also believe that Waldorf education would widely benefit communities, and allow children access to more holistic learning that is not currently provided in most public curriculums, while at the same time meeting national and state standards.

I also support the UNICEF program because it is so important that we raise students to be conscious, compassionate, and mindful consumers and global citizens, and learning how many of our actions and purchases affect other children and people worldwide.

Leadership Compass Self Assessment

When I took the Leadership Compass Self Assessment, I found that I most aligned with the Vision style of leadership and skills.

Some of the strengths that were mentioned for the Vision style were the ability to see the bigger picture. I think I have this ability in my everyday life, and as I get older, I feel like this skill has grown in my way of working. I think it is important as an educator to see the bigger picture, while creating building blocks or stepping stones along the way for your student's to follow while you know what the bigger goal and purpose is for them, so that they be collecting skills along the way with diverse activities and projects.

Another skill that I could relate to was the ability to problem-solve and think outside the box. This is an important skill to avoid tedium, or doing small tasks and homework that can be boring and unrelateable, but rather to make learning relevant and meaningful. I think this has served in my education because so much of what we are given can be made more fun or creative, if we make it our own, whether it is a group project, a research paper, or a paper. I think I have the ability to have a task or assignment given to me as a student and educator and really shape it with my ability to imagine and create, and allow it take on a different form. It's something I really enjoy, and I think it will serve me well with students to make learning engaging and fun, while giving them ideas, but also guiding them to hone similar skills of thinking outside the box and making ones ideas come to shape and work for them.

I also tend to take on problems as a fun challenge. I am quite adaptable in this way, and it has served me well in my life, and will most definitely serve me well as an educator. I think this is great skill to have in the classroom because students and curriculum will not always line up and problems and challenges will arise. I think the ability to face challenges is a great strength to have and be able to bounce back when they arise, and to be able to role model that behavior will be helpful.
I think areas for growth will be carrying out visions that I have, and sticking to the mission defined. I tend to have many great ideas, but to be able to stick to it through finish is my something I need to pay attention to and work on.

Morning Pages: Privilege Walk

Would I use this exercise in my classroom or not?
I would use this exercise with a classroom of students in high school. Like the black male in the video admitted it reminded him of when he was in school learning about black slavery, and how it made him angry for a few days, and then he realized that this is just the way it is.  I think those feelings would be too intense for someone in middle school, when students are already grappling with many identity issues.  I think making glaringly obvious their place in the line up of privilege would cause humiliation, resentment, and maybe would not be very effective, because middle schoolers in a lot of ways are constantly wanting to fit in and be like their peers. However, I believe that high schoolers would be more apt to gain from a Privilege Walk experience. High schoolers are more mature, and yet are still grappling with identity issues as well, but may be able to reflect more on the activity and see how privilege plays such a huge part on an individual's chance at success in our society and greater world. I would hope that it would speak to those with privilege even more than those without, because I feel like that is where change, acknowledgement, understanding, and empathy needs to come from.

While watching this, I felt a flood of emotion, mostly grief and sadness that our world is so stratified, and that this stratification really harms people's sense of self worth, which is the driving factor in creating in our life. It also makes me sad to think that so much of the success and achievement that humankind has made in the past 200,000 years has very much been bred on the backs of others, and has been very much dependent on there being a poor, enslaved social class.

It is about time that we eradicate the notion of social stratification and through this kind of awareness building so that each new generation has newer, fresher, unbiased eyes towards their fellow peers and citizens, and so that gifted people from marginalized classes can contribute to the growth of our society's development, and their voices will not slip through the cracks of discrimination and bigotry.

It is hard to imagine a world without this kind of stratification, because it is incumbent in every aspect of our society, from the play school yard, to the workplace, to the residential neighborhood to the line in customs.  Yet it is our job as global citizens to continue to peel back the layers of delusion that has allowed this kind of privilege/non-priveilege mindset to prevail.

As hard as these kind of activities can be, emotionally and socially challenging, they are a necessary discomfort we all must push through.

Morning Pages: Teacher as Reader

So thinking about what reading means to me...
It is such an important activity to me, but one admittedly, that I don't get to do enough outside of class readings for school.
It is a hobby that I reflect on with nostalgia, as well as love and comfort.
I believe reading is so important as a teacher and a learner because it allows us to reflect on other author's perspectives, hear different styles of writing and voices, and get new ideas.
I think the older we get, the more prone we are to stick to what we know, and reading outside of that arena is so very important in my opinion. Because we tend to like what is familiar to us, and with voices that we agree with, it can make us predictable and comfortable. It can sometimes be difficult to find a topic or author that is new and different. I think this is probably the issue for most people that don't stray from the norm. Yet there is so much writing out there!  The internet is so great for finding new material and voices to read because of hyperlinks on blogs and social media. If I had more time in my day and life, I would be doing a lot more leisure reading.
I recently went on a short vacation to Sanibel Island. It is literally an island in Paradise! No chain stores whatsoever, and strict zoning keep it pristine and preserved. It really made me want to read. Of course, the only books I brought were Nineteen Minutes, by Jodi Picoult, and Teacher Wars, which I'm reading for this class. But, if and when I get more space and time to read and be in paradise, it feels like the perfect place, with the sounds of waves and birds as a backdrop to a good novel or non-fiction, or poetry. But in the mean time, I will enjoy the reading I am given, and take the most out of it, and make these dollars of tuition count. Gratefully, I have been given some really great reads this semester in my classes, namely Civility by Stephen Carter; Why School? by Mike Rose, and the above reads that I've mentioned bringing to Sanibel with me.
So to me more than anything let's read because it keeps flexing our mental muscles, keeps tuning our writing ear. 

Morning Pages: Remember When

remember when

Write about your favorite experience/memory in the classroom so far (if you haven’t been in the classroom yet, write about something you hope to experience). Why does this memory stand out to you? What did you learn from it? What does this experience and how you feel about it say about your beliefs on education in general? How did this moment make you a better student? How will you use this moment to be a better teacher?

My "remember when" moment would be when I was teaching elementary Spanish to a classroom in Boulder, of kindergarteners. I don't remember what we were working on, or what the activity was, but I remember being in a circle with about 10 students. One student, Eva(not her real name), began to cry. Normally, Eva was my star student, and she loved learning Spanish, speaking it, helping other students, being involved, volunteering, you get the idea. But, for this activity, she was not herself, she was not remembering the material and she felt really bad about it. At one point, she began to cry. I asked her what was wrong, and if she was okay. She said, "I miss my mom!" and so I said, "Okay, let's go ahead and sit down and have a chat as a group." We all sat in a circle and Eva told us how her mom was on a business trip in Denmark, for one month, and she really missed her. I could tell this was really affecting her, and it was so comforting to know that she felt comfortable sharing it with me and the group. The other students began to share similar stories of their parents having to travel for business and how they missed them too. Although Eva's eyes were blotchy and red, I could tell she felt relieved, and she was listening intently to her classmates, whom also had felt hurt about similar issues.It was so incredible to me to see them supporting each other, relating with each other, and feeling better through the process. I was so happy that they had all had a chance to know more about each other, about a subject matter that usually isn't highlighted in class, missing parents, sadness and heartache. I feel like it brought us all closer as a group, building trust and compassion. 

Morning Pages: Cyber Bullying and a Compassionate Classroom

How do we create compassion in our classroom?
How do we help students feel comfortable to be themselves. Easier said than done. Perhaps by giving them time to work together, depend on each other, help each other.  It's hard to imagine teaching content as well as socio-emotional skills in the process.
If every lesson we give involves some kind of small group work, students can begin to feel more connected to each other.
It takes a lot of responsibility on the teacher to be aware of the needs of the students, like which ones are more meek and timid, and which ones are helpful and outgoing. Matching up students in group work time to help balance out the class while engaging them to get to know each other is definitely not an easy task, but very necessary.
I think to combat cyber bullying, having a unit on bullying and showing a movie or media clips on the subject would help spark thoughts, ideas, and conversation, as well as raising awareness.  I think a good place to follow would be to ask students what they can do about cyber bullying, make a paster or a video broadcasting their ideas and solutions.
We all know that bullying isn't eradicated by having an authoritative figure punishing a bully, but rather it needs to be attacked from all angles, especially in peer circles, and from the ground up.
It is so necessary to have time to talk about the impact, dangers, and how students can play a huge part to end cyber bullying in each class in each grade.  The problem is such a huge one in our nation, and it needs a lot of attention.

Meeting the Expert and touchibrain ng on Testing and Bullying

During my CO301D class today, I had the pleasure of meeting with a CSU professor, and expert in the field of education, Dr. Antero Garcia. He spoke to us on the impact that NCLB has had on education, as well as the more recent legislation. He spoke how standards and the CORE requirements dates back all the way to the 80's when the idea of testing and standards first was birthed. He spoke of how the recent generation, or anyone who in school since 2000 is basically a product of this standardized testing era. Obviously, some good has come out of it, or better said, some have survived and at least gotten a good education, and not been swallowed up by the intensity and dominance of testing in schools. But, have these students gotten as good of an education compared to prior generations? How has their education differed.  So much time is spent on preparing for tests, pre-tests, and the actually time it takes to test. Sometimes this can exceed a month of precious school time. I did a debate in my Public Argumentation communications class last semester on whether standardized testing or portfolio assessments would be better for k-12 students. I also did a research paper in my English class last summer on a similar subject, why standardized testing is ineffective. This class has given me a great opportunity to actually "test" out, pun intended, lol, the efficiency of different assessment methods, such as creating a portfolio to fulfill our badge requirements in this English Composition class.  I have noticed that my brain automatically is used to striving to achieve a grade, to look for due dates, and to be ready to cram. But, this badge system has no exams, no grades, only levels and markers to achieve in order to progress to the next level. It has allowed me a lot more autonomy in my learning and self-directed process.

On another note, I asked Dr. Garcia if he could speak on what we can do as future teachers and parents to advocate against the serious problem of bullying including cyber bullying. He said it is not an easy problem, and that a lot of schools have a "Zero Tolerance" policy. Unfortunately, as one fellow student pointed out, this doesn't really do anything to resolve the issue. It states a claim but doesn't do anything to back it up. He said what is important is creating a classroom in which students feel they can be themselves. They are not afraid to speak up and speak out and show who they are. How do we create such a safe and comfortable space for our students? It is definitely a tough topic to tackle. He said there will always be the more introverted types, but that it is important for them to feel like it's okay to be who they are. What I've learned is that bullying isn't solved top down, but rather by and through peer intervention. It takes social engagement from those witnessing the bullying to stand up and say something to stop it, to note how uncool and unacceptable it is.

He left us on the note that we have to teach socio-cultural and socio-emotional skills. Hmmm, it has definitely gotten me to thinking. What are socio-cultural skills? What comes to mind for me is being inclusive to all cultures, to all types of people, and then giving students the opportunity to engage with each other, learn from each other, trust and grow with each other. Easier said than done. But this topic of socio-cultural skills has always been important to me. Every since I started studying a second language when I was eleven, I've wanted to get to know different cultures, to travel the world, be an explorer and discoverer.  When I was teaching Spanish to English speakers in the Boulder valley school district as an extracurricular activity, I always included culture in the lessons, the lessons of language actually stemmed from the cultural explorations, whether it was food, music, art, craft, or literature, folklore, and the students ate it up, sometimes literally!

I think this kind of teaching can help make students feel comfortable with the idea of "other" to the point that "other" begins to dissolve, and "we all" emerges stronger and sturdier.

I look forward to delving more into advocacy against bullying and also for  building socio-cultural and socio-emoitional "culture" in schools.

Morning Pages: The Hot Button of Technology, Ouch!

I am of the mind that technology is a power and tool that we should be able to make work for us, and not vice versa. I believe in education, it has the possibility of allowing students of different learning styles to be engaged and stimulated.  At the same time, it allows students the ability to learn how to present their ideas, research, and work in a way that is stimulating and engaging to their peers.

I think of technology as a convenience, as a vehicle, as a tool. It's something that we can try to avoid or not keep up with, but it seems to make it a whole lot harder if you don't keep up to date with it.

In terms of schools and their use of technology, I believe that having the basics for presentations and research use is important. but I also think that some of the essential ingredients in schooling consist of non-technological resources and skill-training like learning how to work with peers, which can be enhanced and facilitated by technology, but can be just as potent without. Students are so entrenched in screen time throughout their days and lives, and I think time away from the screen is even more important than time in front of the screen. I believe that socio-emotional and socio-cultural skill building is very important in education at all levels.

With this said, I think that what a school has in terms of technology is enough, and we work with what we are given. A school can strengthen student's skills in other mediums like art, theater, outdoor education, physical education.

What does teacher advocacy look like? Why should teachers be educational advocates?

What does teacher advocacy look like? Why should teachers be educational advocates?  Read How Do You Know If You’re a Teacher Leader? by Precious Crabtree and How to Become a Teacher Advocate by Jessica Cuthbertson. Write a blog entry that explores why/how/whether or not young teachers

In Jessica Cuthbertson's "How to Become a Teacher Advocate," she states "The social and mass media chatter is all too quick to point out flaws in our system but often falls short on highlighting teacher-created solutions and successes." 
I think this reminds us that we have to pride ourselves as teachers on our solutions and successes.  We also have to work to redefine the strengths and powerful characteristics of teachers, own them and work to change how teachers are profiled in the media.  After reading these blogs, I realized that not only are we urged to work as advocates as teachers to share student's voices and needs, but also we are urged to advocate for the teaching profession.  

In our time and age, it is even more important for us to redefine what and how teachers are the center of education, and that they are not a voiceless body, but are working with the youth and students themselves, and are the key to knowing where they are coming from, what they need, what they are attracted to, how they communicate and understand best, and who they are as individuals and people. 

Morning Pages - "The Big Wait"

Waiting, looking at the calendar, counting the days, weeks, months, years. The calendar is something I am very in tune with, whether it is my google calendar on my phone, or the National Conservancy calendar in the hall next to the kitchen, or the calendar next to my desk, I seriously am a calendar person. I have always loved setting goals, and having something or somewhere to look forward to, whether it is a staycation or an international trip, a wedding across the country, or a family holiday, it gives me hope that the hard work will pay off, and some sigh of relief and relaxation, as well as fun and laughs are ahead. 

As an adult student having taken a hiatus while following the Eastern arts teaching path for many years, finishing my degrees at this point in my life has been a major waiting game and lesson in patience. It is hard because as a student my income is very low, and this puts pressure on other parts of my life. So, the biggest piece to waiting is waiting to make some money! I am really looking forward to having a more lucrative job, in order to be more free and flexible with my finances, as well as my nights and weekends, which now are infiltrated by homework, writing, and research.  

At the same time, it has been such a blessing to delve into the area of study, learning, connecting with other students and professors, and really take an invested interest in the subjects I've been introduced to. Yes, I waited quite a long time to go back to school, I had a family, a career, and a child since last going to school!  But, it has been humbling and so eye-opening in many regards. Although I've been waiting and counting down the years, months, and weeks to graduation, I am also going to miss just learning for learning's sake. 

It's a bit nerve-wracking at the same time, to have been out of the job market for a while, and to be ready to take on a full-time full-responsibility occupation. Going back to work full time also represents the end of my son's babyhood.  He is 4.5 and will be 5 going on 6 by the time I go back to work full time. As a single parent for the past four years, my full time unpaid job has been caregiver and guardian for my son, and shifting into him being in school and me being at work full time will be so huge for both of us.  I am so ready for it, but at the same time it feels bittersweet, a rite of passage, a time that we can never return to. 

So, while I am anxiously awaiting getting into the work world, and field of communications, I am going to enjoy the days over the next year with my son, with my classes and with the research that will help guide me to the right organization or company.

Tick, tock, tick, tock.

Morning Pages 3-24-16

Since I did not get to class in time for the Morning Pages, I am here catching up on Friday night! And since I already wrote a letter to the future President, I will choose another topic of my own interest.

I'd like to write about what I think are going to be good topics for my Teacher as Advocate Badge.

I recently was introduced to the movie "Bully" and it was really intense and moving. I didn't realize how serious bullying is these days, and it made me scared to think how many kids are bullied that don't even talk about it to anyone.  That is where the danger lies, and that is when they are most at risk. I think it is important for kids who are being bullied to have some friend, family member or ally of some sort whom they can share with, and get help in standing up in some way to the bully.
From the film, I realized that it isn't a matter that one person can remedy, it takes a whole community. Peers, teachers, mentors and school administration has to be on board to eradicate bullying in schools. There has to be an open and clear message that it is not acceptable, it is hurtful, and detrimental to the whole school.
But in this day and age with social media, so much bullying now has gone faceless, when kids create profiles of fake people and use those profiles to do the damaging act of bullying. The kids who are bullied in these circumstances do not have anyone to blame.  They are just seeing a fake name and the hurtful words or images that come with the cyber bullying.
I think if educators and parents took more initiative to stop bullying by showing films, media, and talking about bullying then there would be a better chance to raise awareness around it in students.
No child deserves to hurt themselves or be hurt in the hands of a bully or bullying.
Children who are encouraged and lifted up can really take on anything, but the opposite causes such pain, anger, and danger that it is a serious problem that our society must face.  It seems it is the country towns that are not doing enough about this problem, and are in a way supporting bullying to continue.
People need to consider who they are voting into office and hiring into their schools so that there is a shared prerogative to really weed out the insidious seed of bullying.

Study that I Used to Know Response

After watching the video, "Study that I used to know" I felt very much in line with what the parody was saying.  It was speaking on the experience of education as being a feeding of useless information.  Much of my experience in school was a whole lot of memorization.  There were whole years in grade school that I don't have more than a couple memories from. I attribute this to the teacher and teaching style.  At that time, the teachers had been teaching for more than ten years, and were very stuck in a didactic teaching style.  For this reason, the information was not as retained.  I think it is important to have a varied education with a diversity of topics and subjects covered, in the hopes that a student can find their niche. But it is unfortunate that some of the subjects we learn are not really useful in our day to day lives. I think if schooling was more holistic, which I think it definitely has changed and grown over the years to encompass more experiential learning, then students can practice a number of disciplines all in the same lesson or project.

I think this video and message was really relevant and true for many people's experiences.

UGP, Haiku, empathy

I think that the UGP, Haiku have something very much in common.
The whole premise of writing in an unfamiliar genre is to get familiar with something unfamiliar, and remember what it is like to be uncomfortable, to wobble, to be uneasy, and ask a result to feel empathy, as a writer, learner, and teacher.

I feel like the more I read in the genre of Haiku, the more I feel that empathy is a huge piece of it. Almost like music, it evokes sentiment, and with that sentiment, we relate to the artist, whether a musician, songwriter, singer, poet, or writer.

I have been reading Haiku by very famous poet, Matsuo Basho, who lived from 1644-1694.  I feel like I am taking a walk with him or with him sitting looking at the moon or the clouds or the sky with him when I read his haiku.  I also have read more about him as an individual. He was known to withdraw from society for periods of time, in an bare, austere hut with no luxuries with only simple necessities.  I feel like he invited the simple into his life and his poetry so that he could see the magnificent in the simple, free things in life. I also get the feelings that he could empathize with poverty, with hunger in several of his haiku. Here is one I especially love.

For a lovely bowl

let us arrange these

flowers...

Since there is no rice

So, how can I produce haiku with empathy in regards to education?  I think of what is hard in education about being a teacher. Many tests, many students, struggling students, stressful nights of grading stacks of papers, little resources and time to work with, parameters and standards to compete with and align to, work-life balance, equality in education, social class stratification.  Then I also thing of the beautiful things, student's laughter, student's aha moments, group energy, student's compassion for each other, students' compassion for their teachers, student's helping each other out, student's being proud of their work and accomplishments, achievements at the end of the year, pride as a teacher, sharing curiosity, brainstorming sessions, student-teacher heart to hearts, teacher aha moments, attuning to a parent for the benefit of a student, getting support from the school in new ideas or programs.

Classroom question marks
Swirling like fish in a bowl
Hooked by teachers hearts

Giggles and pencils
Scribbling dreams and passions
In the shape of school

Courageous souls meet
paper and pencil, classmates
Fearlessly building knowledge

Compassionate rules
Giving room to grow grander
Make mistakes and rise

Seeing you see me
Makes my heart and soul tickle
School rocks when I'm seen

Fear, mistakes, growth, steam
Going forward sometimes slow
Supported, meet me.

I love how this project has been like a group of circles overlapping, creates a flower, a circle of life. It has overlapped teaching methods, being a learner, growing from making mistakes, writing, writing, writing, reading other's work, and creating a final portfolio.

I am excited to see the final product.

I am also grateful for the site Haiku of Basho that let me dive into the feeling of ancient pristine haiku today.

Reflections and How to Reflect

As I am thinking about and reflecting on the process of reading and learning about Haiku as a genre, I like what authors Sarah Andrew-Vaughn and Cathy Fleischer have written on the topic in regards to the Unfamiliar Genre Project on page 105, "Just as Sarah introduces other aspects of this project using the tools of immersion, inquiry, instruction, and integration, she shares past students' reflective letters in order to draw out of her students what might be involved in writing this genre of reflection."
I love how she uses these tools, "immersion, inquiry, instruction, integration."
I'd like to examine each of those and what I have done with them.
Immersion
I have been reading a lot in the genre of haiku since I chose it.  It has helped me expand my idea of what haiku encompasses.  It is all inclusive at this point in history, when it first began with more contemplative and nature oriented subject matter. I've also realized how much it has grown in the U.S. and in the English language, after originally being from Japan.

Inquiry
My biggest questions that have arisen since first thinking about haiku and learning of its characteristics and structure were, "Do my haiku have to address nature? Do they have to always speak of the/a season/s? Must they be zen like and peace-inducing?"
At first, I found that it seemed like the answer to these questions were yes.  I found that that might cause me quite a lot of challenge in being able to cross those parameters and cover the subject matter that this UGP has asked of us, to address what it is to be a teacher, what are our writing touchstones, and what is our process as we identify as writers, and teachers of writers. All these things do not normally evoke in me a sense of calm, or a sense of nature and seasons.
But, the more I thought about it, the more I realized like anything, things happen in cycles. Just like the book, Pose, Wobble and Flow speaks of, we go through cycles, cycles of comfortability, risk, and achievement, or flow, where what we have been learning and pushing ourselves to conquer becomes familiar.
I then think that teaching can be likened to seasons and cycles as well. With every new year, we are going to have new classes full of some possibly old but mostly new students.  Just like with the spring come new flowers, new students come in the fall. We have crunch time, withering and crumbling time, maybe in the winter, or at the end of the year, and this can be likened to the seasons as well.

Instruction
I didn't realize how strict a discipline haiku can be and was historically.  So, not only am I learning how to pose and wobble and flow with the genre of haiku, but I am also going to be instructing in the future.  I love that it comes from a strict history of instruction as well. On scholastic.com's website on haiku, they describe how the most famous haiku poet, Basho was a Samurai in the late 17th century in Japan.  He came from a family of Samurai, and "to become a Samurai, Basho served a local lord who was fond of writing." I love that becoming a Samurai included this intellectual and very artistic genre of instruction.

Integration
 To me, writing is an art, and energy work, just like yoga or tai chi or chi gong, are also arts.  I love that Basho's discipline included the two.  And not only is writing haiku an art, but also a meditation. I wonder how I can incorporate the instruction of meditation and calming the mind with writing and the genre of haiku.

For this blog post, it was helpful to take author Sarah's words and apply them to my own process in my UGP. 

I think this is such a multi-layered and beneficial project that lets us as pre-service teachers take on three roles as student, teacher, and writer. It helps us empathize with each of those roles, and all the while helps us practice writing in a new genre.

Here's a Haiku for the day:

Calms my spirit now
Writing Mediation Mix
Balance Yin and Yang

Some more words from the book on metacognition which have been helpful to me in my reflection process, "Why would I ask you to write about your metacognition in the project? Well, I want to know how you were thinking as you were learning this genre for the first time. What things were you paying attention to? What were the lightbulb moments? What were your moments of complete confusion and frustration, and how did you work your way out of those times?" (Pg.107-8) 

I absolutely love these questions that she poses for her students doing the UGP and they are definitely questions that I continue asking myself as I am working through the last week of the UGP, and I will address more of them in my next blog of reflections. We don't always think to tease out what are our frustrations; I know I tend to push them aside as cumbersome and unworthy, but I think teasing them out and writing about them will help overcome them.  Also highlighting lightbulb moments will make them more real and discernible and memorable I am hoping.  

I really hope that future generations will learn to use metacognition in education from the get go, because I feel like it will help them flow through the cycles of wobble and confusion, and unknowing, and make it okay, and make it really awesome to know oneself and one's own process, one's own clockwork.  

Happy to find Haiku on Education

Today while researching Haiku during class, I was happy to find a pretty site that had a collection of Haiku dedicated to Education!
Haiku after all has strayed from tradition, not only speaking on nature and the seasons! English and Japanese Haiku has kept the rhythm, 3 phrases, 17 syllables each (approximately), but is open to whatever subject matter you can think of.
Thinking about Haiku (6)
Feeling like a new child (6)
Simple messages (5)

Yeah! My first Haiku!

And I really loved the site that I found.

My favorite haiku was

"Teachers light a flame
But how long the fire burns
Is out of their hand"

By Stevie Gray, physical education teacher, Arlington,VA.

I look forward to writing more in this genre, and on education.
Can I wobble (3)
And write still? (3)
Is it okay to fall and get up? (9)

Ta Ta for now!

Angela

Teachers light a flame,
But how long the fire burns
Is out of their hands.

—Stevie Gray
Physical education teacher
Glebe Elementary School, Arlington, Va.